I've been thinking about Motherhood - how I was forced to enter into it on a day I least expected it...and just had to go with it!
I consider the process from that first day, and I'm not talking about my process and maybe the differences to the 'normal' new mother, I'm talking about the regular things, newborns, nappies, burps, sleeps (or night wakings ), routines, solids, boobs and bottles...
We take each step, from getting home from hospital, getting used to our creatures [that is my affectionate name for babies for those of you who wonder :) ] and start to put one foot in front of another, we're beginning to establish 'our' way. 'Our' way of doing things, our way of interpreting what the best thing is in that moment, of mommy'ing and adjusting to this new season. So many things to work through - and yet all moms the same things: breastfeeding/bottle, for how long, how to get my child to sleep, must I wake them, when to start solids, what to start with, taking babies out and about, the first high temperature and just so many more decisions / thoughts / mini-processes to go through.
I do find it incredible how everyone says something different, how there's not one way to do it, how you can go from the extremes of demand-feeding and going with the babies flow to a strict time-based routine style of when to feed,sleep,how to play etc! How it seems that there is almost someone to be negative, complain or just not want to understand the choices you've made. Everyone approaches it differently, but yet, there's so much to learn from each other.I love to engage with others and I continue to learn from all moms, with babies of all ages. For me, motherhood can be so emotional. Processing all these practical things - emotional. I don't know why.
I've been at it for a year and two weeks...and I'm still finding my feet. I have established what I think I believe works for me, but its not flawless, it still ends up in days when I've had enough of figuring it out on my own, where i want a black and white manual to follow - but, I know deep down, that I receive so much joy in the process of figuring it out.
The special needs aspect adds a whole different level to the journey, it feels as though each step can feel heavier and can trigger so many more emotions than necessary, but the destination seems richer. It stretches me to make decisions when normally I'd float, to try to be intentional about as many things as possible, to be all that God graces me to be every moment.
But, our journey is really just normal with a special twist, us mothers really do have a lot in common.