Sunday 6 June 2010

The weight gain and my time thing

Never thought I'd be celebrating weight gain. Not that I'm celebrating today, as her weight is so up and down.this week was a 60(week9to10).Never beeen that low before.We did have vaccinations and changed cycle to 3.5hrs in the last week - shall I just put it to that? But now we back to 3hrs.Horrible. Feel sad about it - especially when you don't know if its because of something or just 'cardiac' related. Could have been with her more I'm sure.
I need to get myself to relax [not that i'm uptight...more just rushing around doing things],spend time doing KMC with her and just not be rushing aound-is always the best answer. Good for everyone. I believe strongly in skin-on-skin...even after two months. Why do the Africans hardly have colic? Babies with the mothers ALL the time. Of course its so effective at birth, something that I long to have had, but do believe that she's happiest when she's right with me, skin on skin - not with me rocking her in panic because i need to get her to sleep independently before she creates bad habits. I'll get to that one day.
I'm feeling pressure to do things,but I actually just want to do nothing.Don't want to sort out my house,have tons of visitors, get out and about, clean up, wash up etc.just want to move into my bedroom or sit on the couch and not have to do anything. Not in a 'bad' depressed way, more just in a time together, bonding way! Anyway,will take it week at a time,but when I already look at the calendar for next week...i wonder where this is going to come in!

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